Why I Stopped Trying to Be SuperMom

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It’s time to stop focusing on perfection and think about all the amazing things we bring to the table every single day.

Why I Stopped Trying to Be a SuperMom

This past year with us taking a HUGE leap of faith to leave NYC for the burb life brought on so many more humbling and “aha” moments that I can honestly count on my fingers and toes. Looking back, I’m able to see this very clear path of why different things happened the way that they did and how good it feels knowing that we’ve made such big strides to be where we want to be in life. It’s thrilling, actually. However, most pieces of our puzzle haven’t been easy, but the hard parts are finally paying off.

// Baby MORI Mama Lounge Top c/o //

Before I met Chris, I spent so much of my life feeling less than everyone around me. I had zero confidence to speak up, to push myself, to really follow my dreams. Chris has pushed me to step outside my comfort zones, which I’m proud to say is something I can finally do all by myself now, and I’ve pushed him, too. I think it’s important to have a partner who will do that for you. And then we had Branden, and then Blake almost nine years later, which came along with their own challenges and many moments where neither of us knew what we were doing, but knew it always came from a place of love.

Feeling less than came back to me through motherhood, as I compared myself to all the moms around me. It’s just so hard not to! And believe me I know that there is always more than meets the eye and that we’re all the hot mess mom sometimes, but I always strived to reach this stupid “super mom” goal.

// Baby MORI Mini Lounge Top c/o //

It became a game in a sense.

If I made it through the day without yelling at Branden or feeling completely overwhelmed with Blake, it would be a super mom day. And if I had big plans and they failed or I completely messed up an activity I attempted from Pinterest, it would be a mom fail kind of day. So it became this yo-yo affect where I would go to sleep every night feeling like a rockstar or a bad mom. This awful mom guilt cycle started pretty much when Branden became a toddler and learned how to push my buttons, all the way up until recently with Blake.

It took the perspective of my mom one day, that helped to shift my mindset.

It was fall of last year and Chris was away at a military training and I was in Pittsburgh with the kids. Blake was experiencing MAJOR sleep regression and the nights just weren’t getting better, making the exhausted days even harder. I was getting calls almost everyday from school about Branden’s behavior, this was before we got his ADHD diagnoses, which changed everything for the better. I was being extra hard on myself because I was so tired and kept putting Branden’s behavior on myself. Needless to say I was still in my pajamas whenever my parents got home from work and had neglected pretty much any work that day. I was crumbling.

My mom got home from work before my dad and she asked me that usual, “how was your day?” I looked at her grumpy, jealous she got sleep last night and got out of the house today.

“I accomplished nothing today,” was my response.

“Not true,” she said. “You kept the kids alive!” She chuckled. I know, so silly – but true!

Within that moment I realized that if I could break free from the everyday pressures I was putting on myself (that no one cared about besides me), stopped trying to be Supermom and realized that I was a Super Mom, that everything would change.

Spoiler alert: it has.

Don’t get me wrong though, it wasn’t like the clouds parted and every day of my life is now pure bliss. So far from the truth. I’m still your run of the mill, sometimes overwhelmed mom. The difference is that I’m able to see things for what they are. I keep our kids alive every day. They are always clean. They always have food and a house over their heads. They giggle, and laugh and have fun. They are happy, which makes me happy. And that’s all that matters.

And at the end of the day, I want our kids to recognize me as a strong mom. A mom who never gives up and always gives her all, which is why I’m obsessed with these matching mommy and me sweatshirts Blake and I are wearing from Baby MORI, Mama & Mini collection!