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Remember when you were in high school and got caught doing something you weren’t supposed to be doing with a group of people? Some of your friends would start freaking out because they knew right away that they were going to be in “big trouble”; some even knew EXACTLY what their punishments would be. While others were more relaxed about it, knowing this wasn’t going to be a big deal with their parents. It makes me cringe just thinking about being on the disciplinary side of this insinuation with Branden someday.
Anyways, this scenario got me to thinking about the different parenting styles that exist in the world and how as a parent it is so important to make sure that we are parenting with the appropriate methods that work for our children. In some cases, we must parent each child differently, based on their unique qualities so that they are able to grow in their individual ways.
I remember learning about parenting styles in Child Development class in high school, but after becoming a parent, I’m not sure I really see how important it is to categorize ourselves into a specific parenting “style”. After all, each day we are faced with new obstacles to overcome and different situations. I personally don’t want to feel bound to acting in a certain manner or always react a certain way to everything that comes my way as a parent.
But as usual, this thought got me to doing some research because I do think its important to stay on top of these things, so here are the 4 parenting styles in a nut shell:
Indulgent Parents- This is considered to be the more permitting and contemporary type of parenting. These parents are overall more lenient, but are also very hands-on and involved in the day to day happenings of their children. (Also known as permissive)
Authoritarian Parents- This type of parenting is more demanding in nature. Parents focus on giving their children a highly structured environment and want their requests to be carried out without hesitation.
Authoritative Parents- This type of parenting uses and yields a mixture of the first two.
Uninvolved Parents- This type of parenting is neither commanding nor highly active with their children. While most parents who fall into this category fall into a normal range of styles, more extreme cases can be considered neglectful to their children.
Parenting.com has a really great quiz that you can take here to find your parenting style. The results are immediate and it can be helpful if you and your partner are yearning to identify where you fit. It can also be a “safe” way of bringing up the topic that you and your partner may have different, possibly conflicting, styles.
Or, you leave the “style” issues for the fashion designers, and follow your own instincts and principles when parenting issues arise! I find it interesting to note that of all the decisions that parents have to make in the early years, this issue of how to parent seems to come the easiest to most people. Most parents seem to know right away where they stand on this, whether it is because they gleaned their parenting style from their own parents, or whether it is in spite of their own parents. So, do neglected children grow up to be neglectful parents? Or do they over-protect? Or do they try really hard to be fair and sqaure, right down the middle? Interesting stuff, isn’t it?
Overall, everyone has different beliefs about parenting styles, such as that self identifying will help you raise more cooperative or responsible children. Or that children just need to toe the line and they will turn out right. Et cetera. The choices are really up to you and your partner. But hopefully, we’ve all come far enough down the road to be willing to look at our own actions and evaluate whether they are achieving the best results for each and every unique child.
I would love to hear your thoughts, comment below!
Fashionably Yours,
Allison
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