Guest Post: I’m Bringing Sexy (Happy Moms) Back

Motherhood. It has our name in it but it’s rarely ever about us. Should I be embarrassed to admit how many days I actually never get out of my pajamas?

Lately I’ve been reading all these judgmental posts on moms hating on other moms. I won’t lie – I sometimes give the up-down look-over to other moms at the playground – but I mean this is NEW YORK – it just might be Katie Holmes behind those massive sunglasses!

 Either you look like Maria Kang or Victoria Beckham or Baby Sideburns (trust me that’s not a dig – I love and live through her happy hilarious disastrous life because she OWNS it).  The only thing that matters is that you’re happy, because someone will ALWAYS be judgmental – even if you’re Mother Theresa, so stop beating yourself cause you’ll never be her.

 What you CAN do – is find time to live and love. I wouldn’t go as far as getting into a skimpy bathing suit and posing on social media like Kim Kardashian – but if that’s what makes you feel good honey – GO FOR IT! Just remember that the Internet is forever…. so don’t pull a nip slip!

 So with that – I thought I’d share a mini list of ways for you to be a ‘happy mom.’ Trust me, that sounds sappy – but if you (or Maximo) have to hear me yell at one more cabby – his first word might not be appropriate for this blog, so trust me – we all need time to unwind.

1.     Mom on Mom Time. Nothing is more therapeutic than airing your dirty laundry (I mean verbally not real laundry) to moms that are going through the same thing. I make it a point to take Maximo to a playdate or class once a week just so he can socialize (I mean so I CAN socialize!)

Hot spots – Citibabes – I LOVE this place. They have a massive indoor playground where you can sit and watch while sipping lattes and charging your cell phone with other moms. No better way that to kick off your shoes (literally), and let the kids burn steam.

                        The Zoo (one of 5 here in NYC!) what better than to burn off all your anxiety, frustrations and anger by walking all over a large park that so large no one else can hear you bitching! Get it out girl!

2.     Private Bath Time. The bathroom – when the F did it become Grand Central Station? And we have TWO?! Nothing is more soothing to the soul than spending some alone time in the bathroom, and NOT like dad would – I’m talking a candle-lit bath with wine, a long hot shower, maybe just a facial or painting my toenails. Just 20 minutes of un-interrupted quiet time allows me to feel human again.

3.     Family Get-togethers. Literally I can’t tell you the last time I enjoyed a meal. I love to cook but I never enjoy it anymore because I am always serving cooking or cleaning.  When I do eat I am shoving it in faster than Joey Chestnut at the Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest. When Ralfie said his mom hadn’t had a hot meal in 10 years, he meant it. (A Christmas story – really you didn’t get that!?) So honestly I LOVE going to family outings. If there is someone else to see and hold Maximo that means I don’t have to! Oh don’t start judging me now! You know how excited you get too when you get to sit through an entire plate of sushi without having to shush a toddler, feed him something, pick him up because he is screaming or try to get the videos to play on your phone. It’s heaven. So if you haven’t had a nice meal in a while, maybe you should ‘suggest’ coming over for a visit (ahem dinner) at grandma’s tonight.

4.     PAMPER. I wonder why Princess Kate or Kim Kardashian always looks so amazing in photos? Because they get pampered! Honestly it’s not HEALTHY to not step away from the kids even for a little bit –so do us all a favor (yes we are the ones who have to look at you) and go get spoiled a little. My faves?

a.     Hair – GIGI’s salon in Astoria– Aveda salons always smell so good and give the BEST shampoo massages. And you’ve never had a blowout until you’ve had a NYC blow out. Book your apt in the am and feel like Jennifer Aniston all day. Guaranteed.

b.     Nails. Kikis  on 30^th ave– The best thing about NYC besides the food could be the ultra cheap salons on every corner. You can get a manicure AND pedicure for only $18 – $18!!!!!! AND while you’re there – splurge and get the $10 10-minute leg massage. Trust me you’ll thank me later.

c.      Massage. There are a MILLION little massage places in NYC – now don’t go somewhere sketchy, but there are lots of cheap places to get a fantastic rubdown. Even 30 minutes and you feel like the clouds of Heaven have opened up and smiled on you.

5.     Buy Yourself Something. I realized the other day how many times I’d been in Target, Trader Joes, Babies R Us and I had not bought myself something in FOREVER. You just don’t think about it anymore – and head right for the kid’s section. So yesterday I marched right back into Trader Joes and got myself a bouquet of beautiful flowers for only $5. Now I do it every time I go to the grocery store. Because I deserve it.  And I was so happy to unpack them and home, and I smile every time I see them on my desk.

Have any ways that bring you back to happy mom? Share with us!

Stephanie Barnhart is a writer and founder of Football Food and Motherhood.com — a comprehensive guide to pregnancy and motherhood survival in the city – while staying fabulous, of course. Stephanie  proudly hails from Astoria, Queens  – and you’ll find her and her 14-month old sidekick roaming the streets of NYC finding you the best (and cleanest) changing tables, playgrounds and more.  She is an Expert Mom for MommyNearest.com, has been featured in the New York Times, NY Metro Parent and PARENTGUIDE News. Stephanie also is a tech-for-moms contributing writer on www.kidzcentralstation.com. She is also a speaker to parents on the dangers of social media and cyber monitoring and owns her own social media company, Socialminded Media Group.