I Thought I Was Done With Homework!

Editor’s Post by Deborah Hetrick Catanese

Ah, yes, that lovely sense of relief that comes with having a few more moments to, well, BREATHE, without all the need to constantly entertain restless children on vacation! But just as I would breathe that first deep sigh after summer ended and school began,  a conversation like the following would take place, usually around the second or third week of school…

“Mom, our new Phys Ed teacher Sister Delightful said we need a notebook for gym. Isn’t that stupid?! Who ever needs a notebook for gym?!”

Nonplussed, I respond calmly to my daughter, “Well, honey, that does seem odd. But just take one from that stack I have in the kitchen…I bought some extras, just in case.”

“No, Mommy. We need a SPECIAL kind of notebook.  A binder, she called it.“

Still thinking I can cover this base without yet another trip to the mall, I say, “Look in that top closet. Isn’t there a notebook in there that you can use?” I honestly try to be prepared for these random requests from people who think we Moms have nothing else to do.

I resume my early dinner preparations while she rummages through the available school supplies, followed by…

“No, Mommy. The one you have doesn’t have pockets!  We need one with three pockets. And it has to be white.  And it has to have one of the pockets in the front.  And if I don’t have it by tomorrow, then I get an E!”

Last time I checked, my 5^th grader didn’t have a driver’s license to get to the local office supply store without me.  And I was already pressed for time, with my son needing to get to the “peanut league” soccer try-outs, where I as a parent would be expected to commit myself to even more volunteer work. Which was the true purpose of these try-outs, as far as I could see, since all the kids got on the team just for showing up.

So to the matter at hand, which was the very friggin special notebook for gym class so that my brilliant child wouldn’t get the first E of her life at my hand, I suggested to my daughter, “Well, honey, we can go after the soccer try-outs to get that binder thing.  I don’t have anything like that around here.”

“NO, MOM!   I have to be back at school in an hour if I want to be in the school wide spelling bee!   And I have to sell ten MORE magazines by Friday so my homeroom can have a dress down day!!!”  Ummm, who exactly is going to sell those magazine subscriptions, I wonder.

Then my son chimed in, “Mom!  The second grade gets to do science projects this year!   They are putting the best ones on stage in the cafeteria, and our parents are allowed to help!”  Oh joy, I think to myself.  Can’t wait to be in competition with Little Miss Perfect Mother for this one!

But really?  Who are they kidding?!  These assignments aren’t being given to the kids! They are being given to their mothers! Their stressed out, over taxed, already graduated Mothers!

I THOUGHT I WAS DONE WITH HOMEWORK!!

So yeah, excuse my little hissy fit right there. But really, if we Mamas are going to get the work, can we get a report card, too?  And maybe a dollar or two for each of our A’s?  Wonder if I can put this Mama GPA on my resume…

At this point, my lovely Mamas, I don’t want to add to your workload  by asking you to tell me about your unexpected “assignments” this week.  But if you do, I promise I’ll give you a good grade!

Fashionably Yours,

Deborah